With the holidays and winter here, we are rewarded with beautiful, white snow. At least, if you're not a bible belt, red state Jesus licker, in which case, you're not rewarded. NOL.
With the snow here, it's time to think about the important things. For example, what is your favorite position in the snow? Do you prefer it on top or the bottom? Do you like it on your knees? Do you prefer all of your clothes off or with some clothes between you and the snow?
If you're receiving instead of giving, you also have the added option of whether you like it lying down on your tummy while your santa inserts his claws.
Be careful and enjoy your white christmas. You don't want sensitive regions to get frostbite.